I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
