Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
