Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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