On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
She announced her abortion via fbk
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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