somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
We had sex on a dog bed..
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I love you.
Bad choice
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