Say something about gay babies.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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