I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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