Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
