Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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