And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
either way he was missing a nipple.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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