On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize