I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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