Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
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