i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
