It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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