Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
