Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Randomize
