why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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