It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize