Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
