i don't like sucking hair
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
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