I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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