i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
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you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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