I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
