"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
