jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
