just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I FOUND THE LEGS
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