went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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