quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
