You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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