I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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