yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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