i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
