I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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