So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Im part way to drunk.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
