So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
