So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
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my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed