dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
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I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
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Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.