You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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