i think my mom watched the whole time
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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