TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
