HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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