The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
This is the high leading the old right now
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Randomize
