We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
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