ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
