Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
