summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Just puked most of my soul out..
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