What a fucking waste of an outfit
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
