Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
