It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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