I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize