Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize